And I can see that you like horror stories!

Wow Delhi! Three cheers for you!

You never stop to amaze me… Actually…why just Delhi! Yeyy India! You’ve done it again!

You people actually think that women are a commodity- don’t you?  It’s pathetic to see this get reflected time and again in one manner or the other.

Sometimes it’s the husband who beats his wife, sometimes its female foeticide- this time it’s the worst crime ever! Rape!

I swear I do not understand the psychology of such people. Do you even realize that because of some of you- the whole male tribe gets pointed at!

I am truly out of words today. I feel sick and sad at the same time.

Starry-eyed Stare…

While walking along a narrow road

I stumble on a frozen stone

I look up at the winding path

two eyes piercing at me in the dark

they shine so bright, I go still with fright

A chill seeps into my bones

As I stand there… on the narrow road…

Alone and scared, with no where to go…

I decide to walk towards this starry-eyed stare

I take a few steps and go back a dozen…

Suddenly, the clouds part and..

In the silver moonlight I realize…

Its only a li’l pup, lonely in the night

White as snow, his eyes start to glow

He wishes for warmth and love, I understand so

Slowly, the chill in my bones begins to go

and I feel air reach back to my lungs

Now the wind feels like a lovely brush

As I rush… to my lonely pet…

And he welcomes me with a lovely hug…

wagging his tail and his paws on my knee..

he makes me happy and I laugh with glee

To be loved and respected is everyone’s right

And, thence, we start our lovely life…

FACES.

Images that talk! – This is my husband’s blog post. I loved it so much that I am re-posting it here. Here goes….

Faces.
They tell you a story. A story that has never been told. A story that longs to be heard.

These faces and these stories have an existence. But this very existence becomes questionable when the trap is an ancient disease.

The disease was called ‘Consumption’ and rightly so has consumed humans like none other. It doesn’t seem to cease even after taking billons of lives.

The look of despair, the hunger, the poverty fill the world of those affected. The very existence of these souls is now being questioned by their own beliefs.

Tuberculosis kills.
It is now turning into a man-made epidemic with newer strains which are difficult but not impossible to cure.

How far can we go from here is for us to decide? Are we fighting the stigma well enough? Are we giving enough attention and care to these souls?

Author’s note: These photographs were taken in the slums of Jaipur, India. Misery that the patients and their relatives are going through is evident in their eyes.

Day 6: 15 Habits of Great Writers Challenge

I have decided to participate in the 15 Habits of Great Writers Challenge, led by Jeff Goins. So, for the next 9 days I plan to write a short post on a different habit of great writers. The habit for Day 6 (today) is STEAL.

Lets begin….

Steal: Good, Bad, Ugly?

When we hear someone (anyone!) use this word ‘STEAL’, we automatically get a negative picture in our mind- right? I did… but the quote by Jim below changed my perspective…

“Nothing is original. Steal from anywhere that resonates with inspiration or fuels your imagination. Devour old films, new films, music, books, paintings, photographs, poems, dreams, random conversations, architecture, bridges, street signs, trees, clouds, bodies of water, light and shadows. Select only things to steal from that speak directly to your soul. If you do this, your work (and theft) will be authentic. Authenticity is invaluable; originality is non-existent. And don’t bother concealing your thievery – celebrate it if you feel like it. In any case, always remember what Jean-Luc Godard said: “It’s not where you take things from – it’s where you take them to.”
― Jim Jarmusch

See what I just did? I stole Jim’s quote (yes, I gave him due credit) but nevertheless, I stole it and used it in my blog. I use quotes all the time. For me, they are a way to express, in a few words, what others might take pages to say and yet rarely succeed. I also steal images and write pieces around them. I steal moments- from my life- and then I think-feel & write.

Today, let me steal this inspirational article by Geoffrey James on How to be happy at work.

I read the article yesterday, and it just got stuck in my mind. I agree with Geoffrey when he quotes, “When you’re unhappy, it’s because you’ve decided to be unhappy.”

He goes on to say “Happiness and unhappiness (in work and in life) result entirely from the rules in your head that you use to evaluate events.  Those rules determine what’s worth focusing on, and how you react to what you focus on.”

As I was reading this article, all I kept thinking was- how true this was for happiness in general and not just work related happiness. It sure is all about RULES in life. If you think that something would make you unhappy, then it sure will. I am not saying that you shoudn’t expect or that you should keep on sacrificing on different fronts just to be happy. But all I am saying is- draw a line!

All you need to do is follow these simple steps: Understand yourself. Understand the things that make you unhappy. Tell your close-ones (or anyone else who is a stakeholder in that particular problem) about these things…. and if they still can’t understand, reason with them!

In the end, its all about Communication- with yourself and with others. If the channels for communication are used pro-actively…. things will definitely work-out… coz they always do!

Soul’s Cry….

I wonder what after-life feels like
I wonder how it begins
after the end…

Not too far… I hope
The day when I should know
the track on which my soul will ascend…

How it feels to leave the bone
What I wonder now…is the unknown

Why was I born in my soul
What is the meaning of my life
What is it that I need to accomplish while I am alive

Numerous people live and die
They have their paths
their destinies fly
in a realm thus unknown
I wonder mine would go…

The motives of the almighty are astound
Why was I sent as myself instead of a hound
I wish I knew the purpose of my life today
I wish I knew what my duties are each day

As my soul wonders…my mind suggests..
Why not just live each day as if it was the best
Who knows what’s in store tomorrow
So live today without cages and sorrow!

The web of life…

“What goes around… comes around” …this saying rules my life. I know that when I do something mean… it always comes back to me… in one way or another. Sometimes, even if I wonder on how can a person live in a certain way- god makes me put on that person’s shoes so that I can know the answer for myself. This has happened numerous times. This ‘karma’ thing is what I call ‘the web of life’… it entangles you and squeezes the pulp out of u…! Literally!

I took this photo at a place commonly known as ‘River of a 1000 Lingas’ in Siem Reap, Cambodia. Whenever I look at it… the following lines come to my mind….

The web of life
is strong & un-forgiving
The justice of nature
is ruthlessly stubborn

No matter the cause
No matter the situation
You reap wat you sow
You weep when you throw
stones at anyone

Life takes a turn
360 & complete
You never realize what happened
When the road became so steep

Hence, think before you hurt
Coz you never know…
when it’ll be your turn
to get soaked…. in dirt!

Your own rescue knight

I look around and I fail to see
What god has in store for me
I crib I fight I laugh I write
But I fail to see
The road to life

We, in this world, are far from thee
But must we forget that we are free
The will to choose
Between lies and truth
The strenght to stay
When people go astray
Is all within us… As they say
But, o dear lord… Is it really that straight

Is it easy to choose
When everything is a puzzle?
A million pieces… All staggered
Different paths, different directions
When dilemma has your mind in a furl
You need decisions, you wish for predictions

You wish for a rescue knight
But u forget that u have yourself… Right?!
So trust thee and think within
What is it that you want, what is it that you need
Coz in the end…
What you get is only as much as u bleed!

Eve-teasing: WHY?

As I stepped out of my office today to buy some snacks to munch while working (yes! i love those high-calorie ones!)- there was a ‘gang’ of not-so-educated fellows standing next to my office building. The moment they saw me- the catcalls began… I know I should be used to such scenarios and probably just ignore them and walk straight past. But, me being me, I stopped and stared hard at them. It had some effect for sure- they stopped and started talking amongst themselves. But it made me wonder a lot of things.

Why is it that I cannot go anywhere in this city without having an ‘eye’ on my back (or front)! why is it that men think that they have a ‘right’ over women? why is it that when fellow car-drivers see me driving alone in my car, they start car-teasing me? there are so many other ‘whys’ in my mind right now! why?

According to many people, the solution lies with me- the clothes I wear, the places I visit, the hour of travel, the way I talk! To such people I say- well… if truth be told.. I dont even like talking to such people who believe that freedom is the birth right of only men in this society. I am sorry if my beliefs hurt you- but I BELIEVE in equality. People take a second to find faults in women. (I will take up this equality debate some other time though).

In my 25 odd years of existence, I have faced numerous incidents of eve-teasing. Every time I am weirdly surprised at how creative these guys can get. But what I wonder the most is what goes on in their mind when they do such a thing- is it just an addiction? or is it some deep-routed psychological issue to reign over women!

All I can say is-

As I walk on the street

I feel eyes following me

from left and right and between

Fly away I would

if only… I could!

And be lost in the sky

Far away from these eyes

that fill my soul with disgust

that make me feel like i am lost

in a pool of in-human-ness

I cringe at their vulgar face

I wonder if they ever feel any shame

Their actions show their inner self

I wonder if they ever earned respect

of a woman- a mother-a sister-a friend

or had fathers who taught them well

I am left word-less

when people say

that this is the way it is

you are a girl-face the fact

so be well mannered and fully dressed!!!

One Day…

Even though my heart is bound
my soul will fly
unto the unknown..
up above the sky…

It is a truth
that i cant deny
life and blood
sorrow and joy
all gone
only memories survive…

image (c) Tarun Bidani

the welcome in your eyes
the numerous fights
the care, the love
the dejection, the hurt
teardrops that ran
like rain in sand
the sweet smell of love
the soothe of touch…

…are all that are left
with you and me alike

the moments that we share
the mischiefs that we dare
the movies, the masti
the adventures and other fun things…

…will be remembered
as stories and snippets
This instant is all that matters
who knows what is next in our platter…

If life is a game, as they say
then lets play it together (& well) each day!

 

Tuberculosis (TB) is curable, but what about Social-Stigma?

‘India is moving towards urbanization’- this is one statement that I have heard, not once, but again and again in the past few days. I can’t stop myself from questioning this statement. Are we really moving towards scientific and rational thinking? Are we really changing our everyday outlook?

I work for Operation ASHA, a nonprofit dedicated to eradication of TB worldwide. Yesterday, as part of my job, I was roaming the slum-communities of south-delhi to understand the level of awareness of TB amongst the BoP population there. What I understood instead was the terrible impact of social stigma that still prevails in this stratum. It is like termite- slowly eating away all rationality from human minds.

When TB infects a patient, she/he suffers from much more than just a health- disease. As if she/he has lost the right to live their lives. Take the case of Shanti, a 20-year-old mother, resident of churiya mohalla (a slum in south-delhi), who was in a desperate state when she came to our (OpASHA’s) counselor in 2009. She was terribly ill and weak with TB. Her husband had abandoned her and taken her young daughter, leaving her to care for her infant son.

None of her neighbors were ready to even talk to her, let alone help her. She had been completely isolated from all human contact. Although she survived the disease, there are many other Shanti’s in India who do not. Our counselor was able to help her fight the disease and our vocational training programme gave her the opportunity to earn and re-instate her dignity. But, not all Shantis have help at hand. More than 1 lakh women are thrown out of their families, to die of disease and hunger, when they contract TB.

More than 3 lakh children are chucked out of schools when they or one of their parents contracts the disease. One such case was of a 11 year old orphan girl Rihana, who was threatened of eviction from her orphanage when her head-matron found out that she was suffering from TB. OpASHA had to intervene and threaten the supervisor that the matter shall be taken up with the agency that funds the orphanage, only then did they agree to let Rihana stay.

In another case, in a city in Madhya Pradesh, we had a counsellor who went into the community asking if TB was prominent in the area. A social worker, in a state of panic, called up the concerned government official asking if there was an epidemic in the community. The counselor’s only fault being that he asked point-blank questions on TB and did not camouflage his image as a ”health” worker instead of a “TB” worker.

The state of social-stigma in the Indian economy is pitiable. There are tremendous cases where our counselors have had to go and counsel the landlord or the employer or the families of TB patients so that they do not lose their homes or work or family. I cannot help but wonder- Tuberculosis is curable, but what about Social-stigma?

Note: Names of people in this article have been changed to ensure their privacy.

Article was published in Onlymyhealth, an online platform dedicated to health by Dainik Jagran.